It is very easy to say "I forgive you", and saying that makes the person uttering the phrase appear magnanimous, but like public apologies, it can often be more a form of public display of one's own claims to moral merit than something really benefiting the person being addressed. Since you listed this under religion, one The problem with writing an essay on forgiveness is that it can very easily degenerate into a meaningless cliche.
We have a tendency to hold our hurts close and cherish them for some reason.
I suppose there is the childlike or childish? Unfortunately, every time you revisit the event that hurt you, it brings up the pain like it was yesterday — at least it did for me.
A Painful Trip through Time I was immediately transported right back to the incident. Everything was just as real as if it was happening in the moment. But — and this is an important thing to think about — I also had the disadvantage of hindsight, so I could add in the things that I should have said at the time.
I now knew how I should have handled things or what I wanted to say in the moment. What made this particular argument worse was that when I approached the other person, apologized and tried to make amends, it was not accepted.
Instead, the situation escalated into name-calling and verbal abuse. I was left feeling like the person who was the proverbial inch high. Was there something, anything else I could have done? I had done everything that was in my power to deal with the situation.
So why was I still feeling terrible?
The Burden of Bad Feelings I was still carrying around this heaviness of bad feelings. I had no way of knowing whether the other person involved was feeling similarly icky — for all I know, he had dumped his emotional bags and walked on.
I needed to do something to release the tension and free myself from the burden of guilt I was still carrying. Writing the Forgiveness Letter I decided to write a forgiveness letter. It was important that the note would have a physical form, so I actually picked up a pen and got out a note pad.
I described the situation in detail and how I had felt about it at the time. I wrote down how I still felt about it, including feeling hurt, guilty, angry, disappointed, and ashamed.
Then I wrote that I was making a conscious choice to let it go, as of today. I forgive the other person. This event and this person no longer have the power to hurt or define me.
Then I had a brainstorm. There were two people in this situation I needed to forgive, and one of them was myself. I had done everything a reasonable person could be expected to do in the situation.
It was for my eyes only. Some people would say it should be burned. I think I shredded mine. That was symbolic to me of getting rid of the icky feelings, but it was a way to feel lighter and move on.
Forgiving someone does not absolve them of something they have done or make it OK. It does free you from having to live under the burden of having to deal with it all the time. I felt better after writing and getting those feelings out.
I can say that probably did wonders for my mental health, though.Copied! Jane, this is the hardest letter I have ever written.
I feel terrible that I let John know you were planning to leave the firm. We were discussing pending changes, and I foolishly mentioned the possibility without remembering your concern. Couples often find it easy to slide into conflict, but not so easy to forgive and reconcile with each other. How can spouses learn to forgive and move beyond the hurts caused by conflict?
Here are seven "forgiveness fundamentals" that will help you to get started. More →. Jul 19, · Black Man, I love you.
I did not write this letter of apology as a crutch for Black Men, nor did I write it to enable certain behavior. I understand that we as Black Women have had our own. August-The Work-Used Byron’s Katie’s 4 questions and turnaround as a means to ease the suffering of a focus in our own initiativeblog.com-Vision Statement-We discussed the importance of a personal vision statement and individually began to develop our initiativeblog.com-Play Like We’re 8 Years Old – Our annual summer PLAY meeting consisting of ultimate frisbee, pickleball, & Cocktails.
The letters are about saying, “I love you and I forgive you,” or “I’m sorry, will you forgive me?” The decision to write a letter of reconciliation is a personal choice. There are other means and processes for forgiveness. I feel very sorry for the things I did and I would love to have your forgiveness.
I know that you love me as I love you and this beautiful feeling should not end because of a mistake.
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